Beavers Seize Sushi Restaurant

An industrious clan of beavers seized and have now been operating The Sushi Den for close to two months. 

"It's been such a relief having beavers overrun our restaurant." Former owner Kenji Sugimori, 47, stated in a recent interview, "My wife has even started talking to me recently." 

Locals are also pleased with the change. "The beavers can't speak or understand English, but at least they don't drunkenly threaten your children." Gary GaryLarson, 61, remarked, referring to Sugimori's promotional "Wednesday Danger Dinners", in which, for $40 a head, Sugimori would get remarkably drunk and then make your family's dinner a waking nightmare. 

"I used to only feature shouting in the Danger Dinners, but once that started to lose its thrill, I moved into a more hands-on presentation." Sugimori added, commenting on numerous incidents where he has picked up diners and threatened them with kitchen utensils. 

Of note in the new management structure is the fact that the restaurant now at least attempts to serve food. "The beavers don't ever give you what you ordered, and almost never get it to your table within a few hours of ordering, but at least it appears to be food. Last time I came here I had to tie Sugimori to a tree out back so he would stop chasing my daughter with a meat cleaver." explained resident and sushi lover Mark Yarmandarbul, 51. 

The Sushi Den is offering 100% off meals if you use its new underwater entrance, but would like to remind customers that they "should stay the fuck away from the pups".