Town Guide
RESTAURANTS | BARS | NIGHTCLUBS | MONUMENTS
Harrington Park
Site of the bloody battle of Hamsterdam Hill, in which Mayor Harrington's Hamster Horde overwhelmed Crazy Carl's Corn Clan to seize control of the territory.
Hamsterdam Hill Statehouse
Where the Ham Hill Legislature meets once every three months for a total of twenty minutes, at a taxpayer cost of $31 million.
Mayor Harrington's Palace
With construction taking place from 1837-2014, it's the only structure on earth built exclusively by rodents.
Hamsterdam Home
Long term mental health rehabilitation facility, primarily housing victims of local neurosurgeon Larry Hapsburg's "Hey you! Yes you! Hand me your brain!" campaign, including Hapsburg himself.
Bigfoot's Celebrity Steakhouse
Closed recently for egregious health violations, the steakhouse still attracts thousands of tourists each year. Many of them perish attempting to get the owner's autograph.
Old Cotter's Farm
Famous for housing the only semi-intelligent chicken, the farm is to be approached with extreme caution due to Old Cotter's habit of shooting most moving things on sight.
Thingamabobs & Things
Come on in to try some of local Martian XR-83W's wares. Best experienced in the 5th and 6th dimensions.
Standard Meat
Producer of fine meats. Now open for factory tours! Standard Meat is not responsible for delicious family members lost during tours.
Hamsterdam Hill Town Hall
Staffed entirely by ghosts, it is open year round. Please note: Strict limit of two dozen gun licenses per person.