Local Chicken Elected Ham Hill Representative to Congress

Chuckles, 5, a chicken who spontaneously gained human-like intelligence in February of 2015, has been elected as Hamsterdam Hill's sole representative to Congress. 

Chuckles' odd victory speech has some unsure of his qualifications. "My god..........What are those? They are hideous! Be gone, wild demons! I cast you out!" Chuckles shrieked at the end of his four minute speech, apparently referring to a group of second graders on a class field trip.

Despite this, Chuckle's supporters remain committed to his cause. "Chuckles is a strong Republican. He stands for family values. I especially like his stance on chicken - human marriage" Mary Mary, 92, said of her choice for Congress, "It's critical that chickens and humans can have intercourse and babies. I am so relieved I do not have to go to jail anymore for simply listening to my urges." 

Chuckles' historic win has also been marred by widespread reports of voter fraud, which are currently being investigated by Hamsterdam Hill's electoral review board. According to local dairy squeezer, George Jeesen, 32, some chickens may have voted twice. "Chickens just for the first time could vote, and they pull this shit on us. First that annoying little piece of meat in between the bones of chicken wings, and now this. Unbelievable."

Rep. Chuckles has vehemently defended himself in the face of the accusations. "My supporters know that I am innocent. I am the People's True Champion, and mere elections will not stop me from grasping the power that chickens have long deserved."

Chuckles campaign manager, Duckles, 4, a lifetime operative for the right-wing Poultry Power Party, is reportedly behind the voter fraud. A taped conversation, which appears to capture Duckles intimidating voters in an alley is the latest electric revelation in the story. "My organization just wants to help. All we need is your vote. Remember son: You don't cross poultry. You hear me? .........what was 'at? You deaf? you little so----?" 

Duckles was hiding out in a safehouse on the outskirts of town before an anonymous tip alerted police to his location. 

In an audacious maneuver, police sprinkled some leftover cornbread crumbs near the entrance to the safehouse. Duckles, quacking happily, scampered out to collect the nibbles and was promptly apprehended by police.